Craig Machine, The [PA] - Stephen Lynch

...exception.

The Craig Machine is his most recent live album and it was recorded in New York City in 2005 and features cameos from his comedy cohorts in some of the tracks. The album title comes from Track five of the album and I will expand on this if you are interested in the review of the track.

=== The Album ===

[Track 1 - Vanilla Ice Cream]

This track opens the album well and features Lynch on ...
...gives the album it's title. Craig is Jesus' fictional brother who is the black sheep. he drinks, parties, sleeps around and abuses his powers. The Craig Machine is part of a lyric (Now the question for you, is not ''What Would Jesus Do'' but where will you be when the Craig Machine comes partying through...?) the song is a brilliant concept and is carried off pretty tastefully with a healthy dose of jokes and clever insinuations. A great track and ... more

Stephen Lynch is an American stand-up comedian and musician from Pennsylvania and he specialises is jokey songs mocking everyday life and plying on social stereotypes and clichés. He has four albums out, two studio relases and the other two are live performances. He also has his own Comedy Central specials and starred as the lead character in the Broadway adaptation of 'The Wedding Singer,' a performance which he recieved an award nomination for.

Stephen moved to New York to pursue his career and from starting in comedy clubs, he is now well known in the US, a regular on TV and radio and is expanding his global fanbase rapidly. When I first heard his music I thought it was a bit cheesy and camp, but I have now come to realise that this is part of its appeal.

I had been shown him by a couple of people (one of whom is a ciao member ;)) and it took me a while to warm to him but I find with most comedians, they get better as you get used to their brand of humour and Lynch is defintiely no exception.

The Craig Machine is his most recent live album and it was recorded in New York City in 2005 and features cameos from his comedy cohorts in some of the tracks. The album title comes from Track five of the album and I will expand on this if you are interested in the review of the track.

The Album

[Track 1 - Vanilla Ice Cream]

This track opens the album well and features Lynch on his own. The track jokingly pokes fun who have racial preferences for their partner of choice. He plays the guitar and sings on most of his tracks and this is no exception. The acoustic guitar gives a frame for the quirky lyrics which he possesses. Obviously the track title is a reference to white skin colour and he mentions Café au lait (french for 'coffee with milk) as another reference to race. the track is funny and the chorus is catchy and energetic. A good way to start the album and no real lines have been crossed, despite the touchy topic.

[7.5/10]

I will provide an excerpt of the quirkiest lyrics after each choice.

{Oh I hate vanilla ice cream, I like chocolate instead
I hope she likes her soul food with a little Wonder Bread
Don't call it Jungle Fever cause that just isn't right
I am not a racist, some of my best friends are white}

[Track 2 - Baby]

The track starts nice and wholesome with Lynch masquerading as the doting father until the first chorus when he savages his newborn's aesthetics. A slighly harsh view to be adopting but a funny song all the same. The track is funny in places but I do think it is funniest when you first hear it. There are some great little references but the track is quite simple really.

[6.5/10]

{She's got one good tooth and one ear and one eye
And thank god just one nose but it's on her left thigh
Now doctor I am asking you guy to guy
Would a really, really, really late term abortion still fly?}

[Track 3 - Halloween]

This murderous track starts of quite chillingly on the guitar, a harrowing chord and Stephen's evil whispers descend into a raucous chorus filled with comical child torture. Once the risky subject is breached, it is easy to how completely casual this all is... there is no malice or intent and in general, everthing will be mocked. The song is written from the perspective of a psychopath who locks up the trick or treaters in his basement. A good track but a bit short on punchlines overall.

[6/10]

{A pinch of your brother a teaspoon of you
With the head of your sister would make a good stew
I'd give you a taste but you're tongue's in the stew;... irony!!
That's what Halloween means to me}

[Track 4 - Love Song]

This is a short track, just over 80 seconds and it all feels quite genuine and innocuous until the last line... which I wont give away. There is not much point in putting the lyrics but take my word that the track is ok at best...

[5/10]

[Track 5 - Craig]

This track is one of the best and gives the album it's title. Craig is Jesus' fictional brother who is the black sheep. he drinks, parties, sleeps around and abuses his powers. The Craig Machine is part of a lyric (Now the question for you, is not ''What Would Jesus Do'' but where will you be when the Craig Machine comes partying through...?) the song is a brilliant concept and is carried off pretty tastefully with a healthy dose of jokes and clever insinuations. A great track and really funny. 'Craig Christ' is a truly inspirational creation.

[8.5/10]

{Cuz when Craig's in sight
We'll party all damn night.
I don't turn water into wine
But into cold Coors Light.
I'm not my brother, I know,
Don't walk on H2O
But I got hydroponic sh!t that me and Judas grow. }

[Track 6 - Beelz]

In response to his heavenly song, Stephen decides to do a song about the opposite, Satan to be precise. The track starts ominously and suddenly jumps into a camp tune while Stephen sings in a camp, high pitch voice to put a mocking spin on the devil. The lyrics switch from Satan's very camp interests to his usually, Lord of darkness duties and they contrast brilliantly. the idea reminds me of the devil from South Park who was also portrayed as a homosexual. A really funny song though, it would have been better if I hadnt ruined the whole 'Satan is camp' joke for you.

[7.5/10]

{My friends all call me old scratch and I am a Capricorn
My turn ons are romantic walks and killing the unborn
I've got little devil horns, and a little Goatee,
little devil eyes to help a little devil see
little cloven hoofs that make it kinda hard to ski
I'm Satan, Woo Hoo! }

[Track 7 - Albino]

This track is a very ballady kind of guitar... in this... an ode to an albino girl. The vocals are harmonic and float over the timid guitaring. The song is actually about two women, the first is an albino, the second is an Old Age pensioner in an old people's home. Both are pretty comical concepts and the song is short so it doesn't get boring at all really.

[6.5/10]

{I was in love with an albino
Her lack of pigment seemed like fun
Her skin, the whitest alabaster
Her eyes as pink, as pink as bubble gum...
Then one day it snowed real hard,
.....and she disappeared}

[Track 8 - Mixer At Delta Chi]

This track is a bit racier and more detailed but still nothing x-rated. 'Delta Chi' is a fraternity house and the song begins by suggesting a college party is getting heated until the subject of the song reveals himself as a college professor praying on the blossoming students and offering them grades in exchange for party fun... a strange one but a decent song.

[6.5/10]

{Tutor her at my apartment
turns into a slow dance
Hey baby, what's your minor I've got your major in my pants
I've love your student body
She wants a better grade
I say if you roll over I'll throw in financial aid...}

[Track 9 - Little Tiny Moustache]

This is almost definitely my favourite song on the album and as per usually, it masquerades as a seemingly innocent love song until the twist is revealed. Stephen sings in the style of a letter to his girlfriend to tell her he is leaving... it becomes funny when his references begin to insinuate she is a hardcore fanatic of Naziism and this is why he has to leave. Some excellent lyrics and brilliant references. Inspiration. The song title is a reference to Adolf Hitler's facial adornment which Lynch's fictional girlfriend encourages him to grow. the track ends with a rousing applause from the crowd, it really is a funny one.

[9/10]

{You keep extensive files on the Nürnberg trials, and you watch them whenever they're airing
I guess I should've known when you bought a new bone for your puppies named Göebbells and Göring
You showed up late to our very first date, I said "how are you" you said "white power"
Call me paranoid but I'm not overjoyed when you ask me if I want to shower...I think you're a nazi!]

[Track 10 - Pierre]

It is here that Lynch introduces his musical comedy compatriots, Mark Teich and Rod Cone to join him in delivering the more complicated lyrics. This song, written as a challenge from a friend is about a homeless guy (easy right?) ... a homeless guy who is French. A little twist which brings comedy to the song. Pierre the only French bum in New York... a cheery little story of xenophobic stereotypes and wine/cheese references.

[7.5/10]

{My story is so tiresome.
(tiresome!)
Back in France, I was rich as they come.
(as they come!)
But I lost all my wealth
And my good mental health.
Now I live with ze filth and ze scum.
(and ze scum!)}

[Track 11 - Whittlin' Man]

This bizarre song is a pacey number about a man who lives in the wilderness whittling normal objects out of wood with his trusty knife to recreate everything he is missing. Difficult to explain what the song is about apart from a man with a penchant for whittlin but it is pretty funky and a vibrant addition to the album.

[7/10]

{had a stump to sit on
had some wood, had his trusty knife
whittled out a house, a car
and he whittled himself a wife (such a beautiful wife)
whittled out four kids, a swimming pool and a big leer jet
and so he wouldn't miss saved by the bell, well he whittled a T.V. set }

[Track 12 - Classic Rock Song]

So called because of the similarity to other classic rock ballads... the song aims for the immature route and in my opinion it kinda fails. Not a dreadful track but its one of the few that I tend to skip. If I put any lyrics I will give the song's only real joke away so they will not be much point in me doing so now would there??

[4/10]

[Track 13 - Not Home]

This brief but cheeky track takes the perspective of a mischievous guy detailing how he acts when his girlfriend isn't home. If you're a girl, it will be funny... but if you're a guy you will see the truth in it, even itf the examples given by Lynch are a bit extreme. A comical song that pokes fun at relationships in its short life span. Once again, no lyrics for you, but only because the track is short and I don't want to ruin it.

[6.5/10]

[Track 14 - Voices In My Head]

This song utilies all three comics very well. Lynch sings from his own perspective and Mark and Rod play the voices in his head as he sings to the crowd. The idea is brilliant but it takes all three comedians to carry off the song so is probably not one Lynch performs often. The first verse is just Lynch but the remaining verses allow the listener to be privy to the internal thoughts. A great idea, delivered really well and this is another of the highlights of the album.

[8/10]

{Thank you all for coming to my show
- Oh it hurts you bastard didn't laugh at my new nazi song and
You've been great, but now i have to go.
- Go and ask that girl in the front to come backstage and show her thong and
Everyone had a super time i hope
- I hope the guy who heckled me gets hit by a big bus, that fucker
Some songs tend to push the envelope
- Open up your eyes, your wife and girlfriend both showed up you sucker}

[Track 15 - D&D]

This track may not be appreciated by all, but it pokes fun at live role playing games. D&D is 'Dungeons and Dragons' which is a fantasy game where players pretend to be a medieval warrior with magic powers in some cases. The comics all play the role of one player and mercilessly poke fun at the type of people who play the game. I have to say as a disclaimer, I have always hated this game, I remember my dad playing it when I was really young and I detested it with a passion - so maybe the song is funnier for me than it will be for some others but with this little bit of info, it should be enough that you will get the jokes.

[7/10]

{I got my twelve sided die and I'm ready to roll with a wizard and my goblin crew.
My friends are coming over to my mom's basement bringing Funyuns and the Mountain Dew.
I got a big broad sword made outta cardboard and that stereos a pumpin zeppelin. (dazed and confused)
It's that time of the night, we turn on the black light, let the dungeons and the dragons begin!}

Overall

Individually, some of the tracks are admittedly weak but as an album the ambience is balanced quite well with a fair mix of tracks, topics and styles. The lyrics don't tend to be too sweary or go too far but they still have plenty of adult humour in them. There are a couple of standout tracks, namely 'Craig' and 'Little Tiny Moustache' and these tracks alone make the album formidable at least. It is understandable how this album has gained Lynch many more fans as he consistently mocks pop culture, fads, delusions and stereotypes to a catchy and innocuous acoustic guitar strum.

I really enjoyed this album and still find the humour in most of the tracks, even on their tenth listen. I would recommend to anyone who enjoys stand-up comedy, the folk music angle is something which is not unique but a musical comedian will stand or fall by their songs and Lynch is succesful in this album and mos of his others in truth. Lynch's act may have some novelty value but there are some many quick jokes and subtle references that everyone will be able to find a song they like.

The album does go by pretty quickly and is only just over 40 minutes but if you canget it a low price then I would definitely recommend it. It suits as background noise but it's definitely not something you can dance to. It definitely about the comedy.

Anyway, thats all I have to say, (hate to leave you but I'm trying to watch a football match here so 'm getting distracted.)

The Craig Machine is something different and a cheery comic angle which is easy to enjoy. I would say that Lynch has to be given a fair chance and might take a couple of songs to grow on you, but if you hear one of the better tracks then you will definitely appreciate where he is coming from.

 

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