Hit Factory, The (Pete Waterman's Greatest Hits) [ECD] - Various Artists > Reviews > A lasting remnant of the gr-eighties

Author's product rating:   

Originality	Average
Lyrics	Standard
Quality and consistency of tracks	A couple of weak links
How does it compare to the artist's other releases	Good
Value for Money

Advantages:	so many classic eighties hits pop - pickers !
Disadvantages:	er .  .  .  .  Tragedy by Steps .  An appropriate title !

Recommend to potential buyers:

yes

Full review

Dangermouse. TransFormers. He Man and the Masters of the Universe. Wackaday with Mallet’s Mallet. My old Acorn Electron computer. Followed by my Amstrad CPC 464+. Care Bears. Button Moon. Going to my mate Dean’s house to play Football Manager 2 on his Spectrum. Paperboy on the Commodore 64. Thundercats. Chocabloc. My first crush on Lisa Chequer, aged 8. Mask. Funhouse. The time she kissed me round the back of the garages (no tongues though). Looking like the MilkyBar kid and being offered an audition to be the next one. An incessant hatred of Sandy Toxvig on Number 73. Gordon the Gopher.

For me, all these things are the reasons why the eighties were the greatest era that’ll ever happen in the history of mankind. They kind of symbolise both childhood and innocence – the memoirs of a dumpy little eight year old who couldn’t wait to be 21. Apt, considering that now I’m 21 I’m more of an eight year old than ever. Apart from the odd twenty pints a week, that is.

Anyway, I do have a point. As you’ll have noticed, I left one very important thing off the above list: the soundtrack to my childhood. Which is where this review comes in. Stock/ Aitken/ Waterman were heroes to me, the three blokes with the golden chalice of musical greatness. The first three albums I bought were the debut offerings of Kylie Minogue, Jason Donovan, and Rick Astley. And, true to form, the three of them have their best tunes featured here: I Should Be So Lucky still sounds as kooky and kitsch as ever, Astley still sounds like Barry White covering Abba on Together Forever and Never Gonna Give You Up. Best of all, you realise that while Jason Donovan might be a lonely dropout these days, he actually recorded one of the most sublime, upbeat love songs of the eighties – the fantastic Everyday (I Love You More). Don’t pretend you don’t know it. It’s the second best song here.

There are other gems that will remind you just how great the Stock/ Aitken/ Waterman partnership was. Borth Bananarama offerings are stunning, Love In The First Degree (all together now: I stand acu-uuuu-uu-used’) funkier than anything Hearsay will ever offer, I Want You Back catchier than Reach by S Club 7. Now that’s saying something. Donna Summer’s This Time I Know It’s For Real would still sound great on a dance floor, and Kylie’s Better The Devil You Know is awesome too. Fantastico.

And there is one defining factor of the eighties I still haven’t mentioned. Probably an unhealthy one, but sod it. You see, as a seven year old, my heroes were a mid-chart boyband called Brother Beyond. Now I didn’t have posters – even as someone so young you realise that catsuitability is important when it comes to adorning your bedroom walls. But I did have their album and I did play it ridiculously often. And off all their songs, The Harder I Try was just amazing. It still is now, even fourteen years on “Even in front of all my friends, you just wanna hurt me/ But I’ll never give up hoping til I make you mine.” Probably my most recited line of my childhood and early teenage years actually. And the best song Pete Waterman and co ever wrote in fact.

Almost every song on here has a pop kick that will get the adrenaline going and provoke your mind into some deep eighties reflection at the same time. Even the few nineties offerings here will leave you unable to resist the Waterman drum machine boogie woogie mind breakdown mechanism (a piece of kit I just made up, by the way). Never Let Her Slip Away by Undercover, the Grease and Abba megamixes, even One For Sorrow by Steps are tunes you can’t ignore. All in all, whether you’re four, fourteen, or forty, you’ll love this album. The eighties were great, and if you lived and loved it like I did, then this is one sentimental collection of songs you should snap up as soon as possible.