Hitler Bad Vandals Good - Vandals (The) > Reviews > Tubas, Mullets and Government Conspiracy Theories

Author's product rating:   

Originality	Definitely a cut above the rest
Lyrics	Sublime
Quality and consistency of tracks	A couple of weak links
How does it compare to the artist's other releases	Good
Value for Money

Advantages:	Some INCREDIBLEY catchy tracks and very funny vocals
Disadvantages:	Whiney voices and some bellow par tracks

Recommend to potential buyers:

yes

Full review

The Vandals. What can you say about a band who cover such diverse topics as mullets, dead girlfriends, government conspiracy theories and Tubas? Well, you can say that The Vandals were formed in the early 80’s in Orange County and are perhaps the biggest ‘comedy’ punk group around. By ‘comedy’ I don’t mean the music – The Vandals play full on punk music – they just have very bizarre lyrics covering a vast range of topics….

At the time of this album, the line was: Dave Quackenbush (Vocals), Joe Escalante (Bass, backing vocals), Warren Fitzgerald (Guitars, backing vocals, Keyboards) and Josh Freese (Drums and backing vocals).

The cover is pretty boring with a picture of the good ole USA with a nuclear family in the middle. The notes do get a big thumbs up from me because they do contain the lyrics – something that’s very helpful as The Vandals have a tendancy to sing VERY fast!

14 tracks and here they are:

People That Are Going To Hell (2.14)

Starting the album as they mean to go on, this is a fairly quick track with cracking lyrics. It’s about all the people who do nasty things to you during your life, but it doesn’t matter because they are the “people that are going to hell”! The track starts off with “ba ba ba ba baa ba ba baa” noises (I’m a sucker for songs with silly noises) and it a pretty up beat track, although the middle section is a lot more ‘dark’ sounding. The Vandals are also good at massive volume changes – they lull you into a false sense of security before yelling really loud!

Café 405 (2.11)

This is a quicker track and one of the first I heard from this album – I don’t think I’d have bought the album based on this track because it’s pretty standard punk rock with the occasional glimpse of The Vandals trademark humour - “and nothing else makes me tick, like when she’s on that pogo stick”. A good track, but not standout…

My Girlfriend’s Dead (2.40)

…Unlike this one! The best track on the album this is about a guy who was dumped by his girlfriend but because he can’t face up to the truth, he tell people that she’s dead. The track starts off quietly with whistling and gentle lyrics before exploding into life. This track is more melodic that a lot of Vandals stuff and you’ll have the whistling bit stuck in your head for days after hearing it – a very upbeat track, which is bizarre considering the subject matter, and the most insanely catchy track The Vandals have ever done. Best lyrics: “I say it’s bulimia or sometimes leukaemia or a great big truck ran her over and chopped off her head” (Anyone suffering from any of those diseases, don’t blame me, I didn’t write it!)

I Know, Huh? (2.55)

Another one of the track I head first (thanks to an American friend who loves punk) this also feature a Tuba which embarrasses my boyfriend every time I play the track – he plays a Tuba in a brass band! This is a fairly quick track with a great hook line on the guitar which pulls the whole thing together. The chorus is again very catchy and you’ll be dancing around your room singing it at the top of your head!

Money’s Not An Issue (3.00)

This rings true with my boyf and me thanks to the line “Feel free to super-size!” (don’t be rude! They mean super-size your fast food!) - the track is about having enough money to treat your other half to something special! Another very quick track with “ooohhh eee ooohhh” noises and some great galloping drumming.

I’ve Got An Ape Drape (3.30)

I’m not a big fan of this one. Bizarrely the track is about mullets (strange 80’s hair styles!) and features some great lyrics – “Make it like that famous country singer, or that guy I saw last night on Jerry Springer” – but it’s a fairly repetitive track and doesn’t have the same ‘catchy’ quality that a lot of Vandals tracks do. The sing-along bit at the end manages to insult Canadians, people from Nashvillie, Europeans and hockey players in one go! Quite an achievement!

If The Government Could Read My Mind (2.22)

A really sweet song! Admittedly the idea of calling anything by The Vandals ‘sweet’ is a bit odd, but this is essentially a love song just with a bit of conspiracy theory thrown in as well – kind of like a musical version of The X-Files. Another incredibly up-beat song this starts off with bongos and a spooky bass and guitar part before changing to a mid-paced (for The Vandals) track with very funny lyrics – “I could stockpile food and join the militia, but I’d rather stay at hope and kiss ya”

Too Much Drama (2.45)

This is a serious Vandals track (Shock! Horror!) about kids learning everything from TV because their parents aren’t around to teach them. This is more like older Vandals stuff and features a weird half sung, half spoken part. The Vandals could never be described as a political band or social commentators (they would have the patience and you can tell jokes!) but worryingly this track does seem to be the way things are going…

Come Out Fighting (2.52)

This track was originally done by Pennywise and is dedicated to the writer Jason Matthew Thirsk who committed suicide. It starts off as a total rip-off of “Lust For Life” but has great lyrics about not giving up and keep fighting for what you believe. I prefer the original (which appears on their self-titled album from 1991), but this is a good cover version of a great song – it’s a great shame that Thirsk didn’t listen to his own advice, because by stopping fighting, punk lost a great song writer.

Euro-Barge (1.53)

Not a big fan of this one. Very quick, very dark lyrics, tons of swearing, not very melodic, very short and lyrics that aren’t up to the usual standard – although rhyming ‘ambassador’ with ‘kick your a**ador” probably deserves some kind or reward!

F’d Up Girl (2.36)

The second best track on the album, this has some of the greatest lyrics and very different vocals – The Vandals have a tendency to be a bit ‘whiney’ but this track definitely isn’t like that. It verges between punk and big band brass style! A fantastic track which is very catchy. Sample lyrics include “I’ll be with you until we find a good solution and keep you out of any mental institution”! A GREAT track.

An Idea For A Movie (2.39)

Another one I really like, this is about writing a movie so he can quit his band and make money. It also includes the classic line “Is it too soon to whisper Oscar?”. This is a true punk track - quick, limited chords and heavy guitar but great lyrics and still pretty catchy.

OK (2.05)

Weird. A very quick track, this song is a conversation between two people and also takes the p*** out of the Spice Girls (“I’ll tell you what I want, what I really, really want!”). In places it sounds like “Ace Of Spades” before slowing down right at the end.

So Long, Farewell (2.51)

Sound Of Music fans prepare to have one of your favourite songs butchered by some fairly drunk and stupid Californian punks!! As I’m not a fan, it doesn’t upset me, but I don’t think the track adds to the album much apart from a good way of saying goodbye!

So all in all, I really like this album. While The Vandals last album (“Look What I Almost Stepped In”) was quickly relegated to my listen-every-once-in-a-while pile, I listen to this album all the time. The Vandals do ”feel good” punk meaning that you can’t help but smile and sing-along to a lot of the tracks on the album. This album features some true classics like “F’d Up Girl” and “My Girlfriend’s Dead” but also some also-rans which although good, are the same kind of thing a million and one other punk bands do. Where The Vandals succeed are on the humorous lyrics and merging unusual musical styles and instruments (including the Tuba!). The fail when they try to be a ‘proper’ punk band and stop concentrating on the thing they are good at.

I’d advise any punk fan to buy this album, because it’s a good listen, but be warned that the ‘whiney’ vocals can get a bit too much after a while and some of the tracks feel like fillers. Anyone who isn’t a punk fan – you should probably try something else!

NITRO RECORDS
15817-2