Horses [Remastered] - Patti Smith

ARTIST: Patti Smith
ALBUM: Horses (1975)
LABEL: Arista



Well, I've not reviewed any albums on here yet that I don't like, so here's a first. "Horses" by Patti Smith always seems to feature prominently in those Greatest Albums Of All Time lists and most people who like the sort of music I like seem to love it. So why am I not jumping on one of the longest musical bandwagons going? Answer, it's ...
...Dealing with the positives first. Musical pioneer John Cale produces the album and if anyone should be able to polish a turd it is him; having done such a good job of making Lou Reed sound so interesting back in 1967 on The Velvet Underground & Nico. Patti Smith has the odd interesting lyrical idea and at times a distinctive pre-punk voice. Also some of the musical ideas are impressive when you consider the album is nearly thirty years old. So what ... more

ARTIST: Patti Smith
ALBUM: Horses (1975)
LABEL: Arista

Well, I've not reviewed any albums on here yet that I don't like, so here's a first. "Horses" by Patti Smith always seems to feature prominently in those Greatest Albums Of All Time lists and most people who like the sort of music I like seem to love it. So why am I not jumping on one of the longest musical bandwagons going? Answer, it's just not a very good record.

Dealing with the positives first. Musical pioneer John Cale produces the album and if anyone should be able to polish a turd it is him; having done such a good job of making Lou Reed sound so interesting back in 1967 on The Velvet Underground & Nico. Patti Smith has the odd interesting lyrical idea and at times a distinctive pre-punk voice. Also some of the musical ideas are impressive when you consider the album is nearly thirty years old. So what is the problem?

Well firstly, virtually every track on the album is at least a minute (sometimes two or three) too long. Also, Patti and the boys deal in melodrama too often for my taste. I don't see how an album can expect to pull off sounding part-throwaway and part-serious musically when Patti herself tries so hard to sound enigmatic and aloof.

First track, "Gloria", is a good rocky number; featuring a prominent piano and an impressively raunchy, high in the mix vocal. Patti and her band put arguably the most accessible number first to lure you in, however the song is 5'53 and by the four minute mark my interest was waning. It is a worrying foretaste of what is to come.

"Redondo Beach" sounds like an out-take or a poor B-side. Sub-funk guitars and an effected vocal do little to grab the listeners attention. Furthermore John Cale's production is minimal on this largely innocuous track.

"Birdland" is poetry set to music. Not my cup of tea at all, but objectively I can still offer criticisms of it here. Patti sounds pained and guitarist Lenny Kaye and pianist Richard Sohl try their damndest to create the necessary tension. They fail. The track drifts aimlessly and the further it drifts the more pained/painful the vocal gets. I suppose you could say this track sounds a bit like the most indulgent aspects of The Doors meeting the the worst elements of Sonic Youth (albeit a lot quieter). At more than nine minutes long this track is closer to torture than enjoyment.

"Free Money" is quite good. A sparse intro and a more convincing vocal set the scene for a Lou Reed-esque tale of life on the fringe. The track is vaguely new-wave sounding, which is impressive when you consider punk hadn't even flexed its muscle back in 1975; making New Wave barely a glint in punk's leery eye at the time. "Free Money" is easily the best track on this album for my, erm, money. There are elements of Throwing Muses and 1980s REM to it. It is less precious than much of the material on offer on "Horses."

"Kimberly" is track 5. A simple bassline and a traditional 1970s rock drum pattern lead us into a more restrained track. An organ gives the song a quirky feel which is furthered when Patti sings;

"The sky split
And the planets hit...
The sky is falling
And I don't mind"

After the needlessly long "Kimberly" we move into the melodramatic "Break It Up." Somehow this track reminds me of T'Pau and Bonnie Tyler. It is an attempt at an anthem, but the track lacks any real depth and emotion. Musically it is sterile and bereft of any real spark; a lumpen piano line and some reverb guitars fail to lift the track above mediocrity.

"Break It Up" does eventually finish. About two minutes after you've screamed for it to do so. When it does we slide unexpectedly into the nearly ten minute long "Land." This track is split up into three "movements." The first part of this is "Horses" which sounds like discarded Siouxsie & The Banshees material. Patti does her big rock vocal and sings about "horses comin' in" and about "doin' the mashed potater." A nice punchy rhythm section and some hustling guitars do their best to improve things but in my opinion, Patti herself is the root of the problem on this track.

Part 2 of track 7 is entitled "Land of a Thousand Dances." It is almost impossible to tell where this begins and where the previous section of the track ends. "La Mer(de)" is thankfully the final part of track 7. Some decent drumming and more restrained guitar playing make it less irritating than the first two parts of the track. Viewed overall though track 7 is pointless arty rubbish. It builds no tension. It knocks down no walls! It merely pats itself on the back for being self-satisfying and insular.

Closing track "Elegie" is sensibly less than three minutes long. Lenny Kaye’s guitars are impressive. He colours in some of the long gaps in the music with an emotive, yet quiet guitar part. Musically it is a simple track, with just a late-night-empty-room piano sound to accompany the skeletal guitar and bass parts. It’s an okay track on a below-par album and doesn’t do enough to undo the damage already done on the more indulgent tracks.

Viewed overall I was bitterly disappointed with "Horses." I’ve listened to it maybe five times in full now, which is ample time for it to have grown on me. Personally I fail to see why it is heralded as being an all-time great. Musically it isn’t groundbreaking, lyrically it is often arty and self-serving. The album creates no real tension or atmosphere and fails to capitalise on the odd decent moment (normally a section within a track rather than a track in full).

"Horses" sits firmly on the borderline between preciousness and smug. Patti’s backing band are unimpressive in the main and John Cale isn’t able to paper over the worryingly large cracks. All in all this is one to miss, but then again I’ve got to acknowledge that many critically acclaimed songwriters and musicians love this album, so it must be an all or nothing experience.

To my mind Patti Smith’s best performance on record is her co-vocal on REM’s "E-Bow The Letter." There’s nothing on "Horses" that makes me want to play it again instantly, although "Free Money" and "Elegie" are both okay. "Redondo Beach", "Kimberly" and "Break It Up" are mediocre at best and most of "Land" and all of "Birdland" are poor. "Gloria" is an okay song, but its weaknesses are those of the album at large; it’s too long, too self-important and overly dramatic.

ALBUM RATING: 4/10
 

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